There is a problem with your premises:
> If I Zelle the wrong person, I am straight SOL.
This is not necessarily true. Zelle is currently under active investigation for whether its (in)action in these cases is actually legal or not. [Example source](https://www.warren.senate.gov/oversight/reports/new-report-by-senator-warren-zelle-facilitating-fraud-based-on-internal-data-from-big-banks).
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