Eli5: How can light not experience the passage of time if it travels at 670 million MPH – a measurement of time (and space)

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If light travels at 670 million miles per hour, then that means in one hour it will travel 670 million miles. At 2 hours it will travel 1214 million miles etc. This to me sounds like a measurement of time, just on such a huge scale that we can’t comprehend it. But in the grand scheme of the cosmos this is not that crazy of a scale. I would think it’s just saying light doesn’t experience time *relative* to us. But Einstein says no- no matter what, light’s speed doesn’t change and, what, relativity just doesn’t matter? It feels like a paradox

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Here is something I wonder about time and relativistic speeds-If I were to travel say at 99.% the speed of light in a giant loop for say 5 years in my ship and come back to Earth I understand It would be about 36 years later for my fellow earthlings and I would have aged just 5. If I brought a computer with me and used it to solve an extremely difficult math problem, say mining a bitcoin, would it represent 36 years worth of “work” on the computer problem or just 5?

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