eli5 Why do we compared married vs divorce for childhood outcomes, shouldn’t the comparison be those who were going to divorce vs those who were divorced?

Question

Seems kinda obvious a happy marriage is going to be better than a divorce. Shouldn’t the comparison be between an unhappy marriage and a divorce?

In: Other

Answer 1

I agree, personally, but really we should compare all 3.

Including happily married parents (or ones who fake it so well that as far as the kids are aware they are) is important because part of the reason for comparing married vs divorced is that the child of divorced parents may need extra help to have the same outcome.

And honestly, even unhappily married couples don’t always make for a bad homelife for the kid. Parents can be on their way to divorce and still co-parent well within the same house. Other times, it is an absolute nightmare for the kids. So even there, it gets tricky to decide where to draw the line