How would you explain what borderline personality disorder is to someone who doesn’t have it?
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There is a window in childhood where an infant needs to receive adequate mirroring and attunement from a caregiver in order to develop a stable sense of self and lovability.
The parent pours from their cup to fill up the child’s, the child mirrors the adult and learns to fill their own cup.
If this never happens (for myriad reasons, not always due to being a “bad parent”) the child will spend the rest of their life trying to fill their cup from other people’s, unable to fill up their own cup. Forever looking to receive from adults the kind of relationship that only can happen between a parent and child.
No adult can give another adult the kind of unconditional love and attunement that a parent gives a child.
Everytime they fall short it reminds the person with BPD of that lack. That reminder is very painful and can result in a reaction.
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