My girlfriend and I talked about sex last night and she told me that virginity is only a myth which refers to whether you have done it or not. She explains that it is only just an idea and it wouldn’t be possible to determine physically whether a woman had intercourse or not. The reason is that the hymen heals back and the vagina comes back to its natural shape even though it’s gone through intercourse or like giving birth.Some articles say to that hymen looks and has different forms in which it depends for every person. I can’t find anything on the net (or I just suck at finding) articles about how doing it for the first time vs second time would make a difference. I know that at the end of the day, it’s whether you both enjoyed it and did it with the person you wanted the most. But I am curious whether there would be a difference between doing it the first time and the second time, excluding the fact that the second time you know how to perform better and have the knowledge of what to do, unlike before.
In: Biology
A virgin is someone who hasn’t had sexual relations. Usually that means intercourse, but not always.
Because the definition of virginity varies amongst different cultures, groups, sexual orientations or individuals, it is a social construct. But once you define what it means, you can make an objective assessment as to whether someone is a virgin or not based on their sexual history (assuming they are honest). It may just be a label that people assign rather than a tangible thing, but that’s not what “myth” means.
There are certain myths *surrounding* virginity though, such as whether it affects one’s psychology or physiology. Those specific claims would have to be evaluated on a case by case basis. Medically speaking there are certain physiological signs to indicate if a person has engaged (or not) in various types of sexual activity *recently*, and whether or not it was likely consensual. These types of forensic tests aren’t 100% definitive, but they’re accurate enough to be used as evidence in criminal trials.
But there are also several myths about the relationship between the hymen and virginity, or that somehow a woman’s body is “ruined” after having intercourse the first time or after many times. Many of these myths have no basis in science, and are steeped in sexism or the idea of a woman being a man’s property. Specifically, no, there is no merit to the idea that under normal circumstances, intercourse should physically be any different between the first, second, or 1000th time for either participant.
There are plenty of online medical resources that can dispel any misconceptions, but if you’re having trouble finding answers it may be best to speak to your partner directly or a medical professional.
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