Why do people often have a ‘mid-life crisis,’ and is it just a fancy way of saying they’ve hit a point where they finally realize they’ve been doing everything wrong?
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I think I had this but whether it’s a “crisis” depends on how you respond. Someone said something to me a few years before I really hit the “mid life crisis” that helped me when I did get to it…
When I was in my early/mid 30’s I was considering a drastic career change- walking away from what I went to college for and starting my own business. I was talking to my dad about it one day and said something like “They say most people quit only a year or two and those who do succeed take at least 5 years to get any stability. So by the time I have a real business I’ll be 40.” And he said, “You’re going to be 40 either way.” That perspective changed how I did everything. It made me see that it’s not too late for what I really want to do even though time is going to keep moving forward and I’m going to keep getting older. You get one go-around on this life so do it how you want. You don’t have forever. When you’re 40, 50, 60, 70, you’re going to have the life you chose, so choose what you WANT. Take (smart/well balanced) risks, and go fucking get it.
Dad was right. I did turn 40. And by that time, I had a successful business doing something that I truly love doing. I had also gotten much healthier, made some better financial decisions, and got rid of a lot of dead weight in my life, including some people who were a negative influence. To people on the outside watching me, it probably looked like a mid life crisis. It felt like more of an awakening than a crisis.
I think what happens to a lot of people in mid life is they realize that they’ve been marking time waiting for “later” and suddenly “later” is fucking here and they could’ve been doing more of what they wanted all along.
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