This is an increasingly common phrase that seeks to help people who feel insecure or have low self esteem. But I don’t understand how it applies at all. A large proportion of what we do is aligned with the societal paradigm for our own survival. What others think of us is of upmost importance because if they think of us in a certain way, it may lead them to destructive actions against us. What other people think of me is important for my very survival. Can someone help me understand this phrase in the way it’s meant to be understood? Thanks!
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When people worry about what other people think about them. They are actually projecting their own self image onto others in order to address it somehow. This can lead to self-destructive ends either by lashing out or self implosion.
People like this are actually looking for people to criticize them so they can address the proxy and confront the pseudo issue. Sadly, this leads to a perpetual loop of harm.
I experienced this first hand until counseling and cognitive behavior therapy cured me.
I recommend the “feeling good handbook” and building a relationship with a counselor.
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