The word ‘Patriotism’ comes from the Latin *Patria* – referring to one’s ‘fatherland’ – and can broadly be applied to any political community you are part of. An ancient Roman or Renaissance Florentine would have held their *patria* in high regard – and generally they would have meant their city, region, or community.
The word ‘Nationalism’ is from the Latin *natio* – another Latin term which, at first in the vulgate bible, and then through centuries of use and reuse, ended up implying a particular *kind* of community, united by specific features which might include common behaviours, language, and/or ancestors (aka ethnicity). In other words, a *nation*. Over the course of the sixteenth, seventeenth, eighteenth, and nineteenth centuries, people (in Europe especially) came to believe that the *nation* should match the *state* – that’s the government – and that everyone’s most important loyalty should be to their nation/state. They also often imagined that the *nation* was like a person: it had personal honour, and a reputation that needed to be protected against others that might challenge, threaten or shame it – with violence if need be.
All this helps explain why quite a lot of people tend to think that *nationalism* is a really nasty thing. If you imagine the *nation* as an ethnic or racial community, then nationalism can (and did) lead to things like the Holocaust. If you imagine your nation’s honour as being threatened, that can lead to stuff like the outbreak of World War One, or China’s modern aggression towards some of its trading partners.
If you just leave the details vague (I like the place I’m from! It’s pretty neat!), you might be less likely to do those kinds of things, and more likely to simply care about your home and try to make it better. That’s why some people think ‘patriotism’ is OK and ‘nationalism’ isn’t.
That said, describing something as ‘patriotism’ or ‘nationalism’ is often a matter of the perspective and purpose of the speaker.
If you want to learn more, I suggest having a look at the works of Benedict Anderson, Rogers Brubaker, Adrian Hastings, and Eric Hobsbawm. They all have different takes on this, but all are really interesting.
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