Why do humans kiss as intimacy?
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People are usually pretty careful about what they put in their mouth, because it’s a good way for diseases and toxins to enter the body.
Touching your mouth to another person, especially to their mouth, is a gesture of trust and intimacy, because you’re making yourself vulnerable to them, and you’ll be safe as long as they haven’t put their mouth on too many other people who might be carrying diseases.
It’s the same kind of thing as how we greet people in various ways by showing empty hands. You’re not only showing that you’re not a threat, you’re showing that you trust the other person enough to not be protecting yourself from them.
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I’m not sure if its just humans tho…im thinking its a ape thing in general,and I believe mother apes do it for reassuring their babies along with bonding….I think only gorilla males and human males are the only apes that kiss their offspring and humans are the only ones that kiss others offsprings out of love and nurturing.
I think kissing is something apes do for bonding with babies and humans though not monogamous have evolved in some capacity to use those early evolutionary behaviors and apply them to everyone we love and further still we developed mainly through learned behavior to differentiate the meanings behind each type of kiss….from cheek kissing as a form of hello to a friend or acquaintance to lip kissing your newborn,to lip kissing your spouse or significant other.
But it also coincides with hugging as a form of comfort for primates in general.
So kissing is instinctual in apes and hugging is instinctual in primates.
But humans have evolved through learned behaviors to differentiate between comfort and intimacy and thats something that separates us from our great ape cousins who still hug and kiss their young to comfort them.
There’s a few reasons but the one I think is coolest is when we exchange saliva in a romantic way (like if your assaulted and spit on you’ll not notice it) our bodies will feel attraction due to the chemical exchange if they line up
It’s believed that when two people have opposite immune systems, that’s what “the spark” is. It’s like the body saying “if we make babies with them, they’ll be superior immunity wise” so the kiss seems different, more fun and arousing.
Kissing could be a function to see if two people are chemically compatible in order to make better healthier babies.
I believe I read once that humans share a lot of unspoken biological information when they kiss: what’s your microbiome like, your health, etc. It also introduces women to their partner’s biological material, making it less likely the immune system won’t respond well when it comes time to accepting genetic material.
Kissing also releases feel good/happy chemicals in our brains, helping us bond to our partners
Keep in mind research may have updated since then.
Human nature?
For what’s worth other animals do things as a sign of affection ex bonobo ape.
The rest are from a Google search:
“Many animals actually do engage in kissing-like behaviours to show affection. These behaviours are so diverse, from dogs sniffing and licking potential mates, to elephants putting their trunks in each other’s mouths. However, one animal kisses just like we do: the bonobo ape”
Rat hole to rat hole?!?
I read somewhere that we like to kiss wirh our lips not only because they are sensitive or other reasons, but because it came from our infancy- from suckling on our mothers breast.
It’s a bonding thing. Human lips are super sensitive, and we find soft caresses of the lips to be pleasurable. Sharing that with an individual we care about strengthens those bonds.
I remember reading somewhere that kissing was originally a roman thing. Whenever the men came home they kissed their wives to see if their breath smelled like wine, meaning they went partying behind their back, as a way to see if they were faithful. Apparently, the kissing between couples just spread from there.
Not sure how true that is though, it’s something I remember reading a long time ago.
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