Why do the Japanese refer to themselves with their family names in public? When is it okay to call them by their first names?
In: Culture
Only if you’re very close to them is it okay to call then by their first name. It’s an intimacy thing, while adding -san, -kun, -chan, -sama, -dono to their names is a respect thing.
If someone’s name is Bob Bobbins, you’d call then Bobbins-san if you don’t know them. If someone is a higher rank than you (leaders etc), you add -sama to their name. If you’re both of the same rank in a formal situation, you go with -dono. If someone is your junior, you go with -kun. If it’s a kid, -chan is apropriate. If you’re bedfellows you’d probably drop all that and go straight for Bob.
I might be wrong on this since I’m just a semi-weeb, but I hope it helps.
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