With our voices sounding different to us (I believe because of resonance through the bones and skull?), how does a singer know when they are on key compared to an external source?
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Actually, people learn to stay in key. It’s kind of “if I do this then my listeners hear that”. For quite many people it is difficult to find pitch.
When learn singing, almost nobody finds pitch perfectly, so it’s the role of the music teacher to condition you by feedback. It’s like learning to shave, first it makes no sense but then muscle memory learns it.
Besides the feedback from outside, early enough you learn identifying dissonance that your voice causes and learn how to correct it.
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