how does borderline personality disorder work?


Think I kinda understand, but I don’t fully understand it. Just want to know what it is, how people get it and what some symptoms are. Idk why but I can’t find any good explanations online.

In: 7

Source: psychiatric provider

BPD isn’t something one “gets”, like a cold or a virus. It’s a personality disorder that one develops over time that comes with specific traits, like dependency, exaggerated emotional responses, and can result in abusive behavior. It’s a learned thing, and generally a response to something in the person’s life like previous abuse or constant stress. For example, if you grew up in an abusive environment, you might feel like all of your emotions need to be exaggerated so people will pay attention to you. That might work when you are in your home with your parents, but the problem is that people leave their homes and carry on these traits through their lives.

BPD clients have a remarkable ability to find those who will most give into their disordered way of thinking, and exploit that as best they can. Unless that person leaves their life, or if that person ignores them until they change, the BPD patient will not change.

Apologies that this isn’t a ELI5 type answer. But I felt the need to share with you some resources I use to understand this disorder. This guy believes personality disorders are as a result of trauma/experiences in childhood. I find his work valuable and insightful, maybe worth checking out.

So symptoms of BPD:

Your personality doesn’t change or adapt to the circumstances. This means that they tend to react the same way to different things. For example….. they may flip out if someone dies or if they spill a cup of water. You can’t tell from their reaction how big something they are reacting to is.

Massive fear of abandonment. They can become so obsessed with this fear that they drive other people away which then causes more fear.

Detached from reality. Kind of describes itself.

You’re either the most wonderful person in the world to them or they hope you fucking die. This can flip on the spot. This is due to a person with BPD generally have very black or white thinking. So they want to borrow $200 from. You agree. You’re wonderful. You don’t have $200. You must hate them. They may have trouble recognising that you don’t have $200 to give them, that you may need it.

Self harm and suicidal behaviour.

Inability to control impulses. This leads to drug use, unsafe sex, gambling, etc, etc, etc, etc.

Very, very, very angry and mostly over nothing.

Inability to stabilise emotional responses. It’s either the highest of highs or the lowest of lows. Returning to normal takes a long time.

Manipulative behaviour. They tend to use their feelings to manipulate others.

Due to having breaks with reality people with BPD may lie a lot or appear to.

Parents with BPD tend to be either abusive and/or neglectful to their own children as they can tend to be very self centred and always look towards their own needs and wants first before attending to their children’s needs (lack of impulse control, for instance). In fact, those with BPD tend to have their children refuse to have much or anything to do with them once the children grow up.

Having a number of other mental illnesses. People with BPD quite often get diagnosed with a wide range of other mental illnesses.

BPD appears to be genetics based but needs to be set off by something such as childhood abuse or trauma but it’s not really well understood what actually causes it.