Eli5: As children how do we learn to not wet the bed, and why is this not something we are born with?
In: Biology
It actually has to do with both physical and emotional development.
Essentially if we didn’t have an established ritual then releasing our bladder at any time and anywhere would be acceptable. Typical wetting the bed occurs both because the bladder is to small and undeveloped, cannot hold it in or the muscles are to weak to “hold it back” and it’s released. Over time our bodies grow and we learn we need to use the proper facilities so this becomes ingrained in our mentality. We know (even subconsciously) that urinating in bed is inappropriate and our muscles work with that knowledge to evacuate our bladder at the appropriate time.
Young bodies haven’t mastered the skill and during potty training may not be physically able to do so. And we wet the bed! As we develop more mature sleep patterns (think newborn versus a toddler) our bodies get better at controlling this mechanism in alignment with waking hours.
This is also why you see “bed wetting” associated with victims of abuse or trauma and as a trait of emotionally disturbed children. Their emotionally maturity becomes damaged (and in cases of sexual abuse sometimes physical damage occurs) that may stunt this skill.
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