I’ve always heard things like liquor before beer. You’re in the clear and that mixing brown and white can go bad, but why are you not supposed to mix alcohols?
In: Biology
So, you play fighting games. Think of drinks as different martial art moves. Beer or seltzer that hang out around 5% ABV are jabs and light kicks. Wines and some of the lower ABV drinks/Liqueurs (say about 15%-ish) are the roundhouse kicks and uppercuts. Then, you have basically anything over that. Your shots of brown, white, tan, and otherwise are your enemies’ superpowers. That includes things like the deadly heavy handed bartender, the snakelike sweet mixed drink that your mom wanted you about, and shots. Shots of all kinds. Those are literal yoga fire balls straight to the brain and other organs.
Now, with all that said, you can take on an enemy through the match if you are completely aware that he is only throwing uppercuts with some jabs maybe. Or, you can definitely strategize over an opponent that only uses super moves. Noob. Countering with time, food, and water can defeat even the best spammer. However, when you get knocked off your game… you take jabs the whole time you are not paying attention to the aptly named fireballs that head your way. Then, wait. I need to chill. Let me get defensive on the jabs and low kicks, and I now can sort of see where the dude is coming when he hits me with the super moves. I can pivot and absorb a couple roundhouses until I need to exit the fight. Grab an Uber after just one Pinot noir uppercut. The tannins are supposed to be good for you anyway.
Well, sometimes you get ganged up on. More than one fighter or the more flourished opponent can come in and completely reorganize your strategy. Right as soon as you think the fight is over. A chant comes on. Upside down spinning kicks!!! Upside down spinning kicks!!! Upside down spinning kicks!!! Well, damn. You’ve lost the match and you didn’t know it. It wasn’t the one weapon or another that beat you. It was poor strategy. Maybe if you absorbed a couple major attacks and then took a couple jabs until your ride got there, the match would have turned out different. Maybe if you just focused on the uppercuts and took them responsibly with the steak that you ordered. Or, heck, maybe you and your opponent could have traded hahdukens and hydrations.
There are other posts in this thread that do a better job of describing different metabolism rates, and ethyl vs methyl, and all that. However, the real final boss of having a fun night of drinking is many fold. Moderation. Hydration. Defeating temptation. Ability to accept bad situations and pivot.
Street Fighter is a fun game until M. Bison kicks your ass so hard you end up with a loss that you can’t continue from. With proper technique, you can “win.”
Last thing, some people really just shouldn’t play the game in general. You have to lose a bunch to learn that lesson. But, better safe than sorry. I heard that weed smoking simulators are pretty dope. I lost all my quarters, so know that this comes from the heart.
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