A friend of mine was recently diagnosed with adhd and I’m having a hard time understanding how it works, being a child of the 80s/90s it was always just explained in a very simplified manner and as just kind of an auxiliary problem. Thank you in advance.
In: Biology
I work at a high school in a position that is more or less a combination of teacher and counselor roles. I have ADHD, 27, and have a lot of students that I work closely with on executive functioning and academic coaching. Diagnosed in 1st grade, medicated 1st- 8th then from college to now. Pretty much researching my whole life on it, and am involved in a lot of intense intervention work with ADHD students. This is going to be long, but I promise it’s worth your while.
Positive factors that affect myself and adults with ADHD:
It would help to know your friends age and background, but if he’s generally successful despite being undiagnosed his whole life, he’s developed behaviors to cope that have helped him succeed despite some of the difficulties. ADHD has given me a lot of positive things that actually have given me my success. These are the general positives, but they’re a double edged sword to the negatives. It’s all in how it’s approached by the person and their support systems.
– Hyperfocus: people with ADHD can put an incredible amount of concentration and effort into things that interest them. When used correctly, it’s an insanely powerful tool. I owe my job today to writing a rap song about metaphors and similes in my college teaching course due to hyperfocus on the task.
– Empathy: ADHD individuals tend to feel emotions stronger and are more empathetic than others. People with ADHD can make very strong leaders in fields where genuine empathy is valued as an important skill
– Creativity
– ADHD people tend to be big picture and not detail oriented
Negative factors:
– [Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria[Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria](https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.additudemag.com/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria-and-adhd/amp/)] I’m putting this first because this is the one you don’t hear about, and it’s perhaps the most important for you supporting your friend. TLDR, ADHD peeps take criticism especially hard, and can often break down because of rejection. I haven’t read into it in a while, I believe the figure was 90% of people with ADHD say it’s a factor, and 30% say it’s the most difficult part of having it. Simply knowing this was a part of it and putting a name to it CHANGED MY LIFE, and has made it so much easier to cope with. This is the flip side to the empathy piece. This is a piece that therapy helps with a lot.
– Distraction in general: This is the flip side to the hyperfocus. People with ADHD need stimulus that interests them, or it is much more difficult to maintain attention than an average person. Of course there’s a lot more to it, but perhaps the biggest aspect procrastination is a case of hyperfocus on the wrong thing for a long time, leading to poor time management. Medication helps this aspect most. The most successful people with ADHD will have the intention and plan to regularly evaluate and take concrete steps to change these habits. Therapy or some kind of other mentor can assist with this, while the medication can bolster that process to make it successful.
Success factors:
– while medication is absolutely the most effective treatment, I disagree with the sentiment that it is necessary for everyone to be successful. My dad went undiagnosed until I did, had a masters degree, and was a high up manager with a team of people under him at Coca Cola. That being said he is currently medicated as I am, and finds it much easier to function properly. Like I said before, if your friend is satisfied with the way he is handling life in terms of work, friends, and family, he probably Hs the coping mechanisms from years of building it up. Ultimately it’s his decision on whether or not it’s the best path for him.
– therapy: while on the topic of coping mechanisms, a lot of times going undiagnosed can lead to bad habits that need to be unlearned. For the HS kids that I’ve seen go undiagnosed until around sophomore year, most common bad habits i see revolve around making excuses for not getting work done to avoid embarrassment and general work avoidance due to lack of confidence in ability. Therapy can do wonders with identifying these things and making the changes you’d need to reach your full potential
– growth mindset: have your friend read into this. If he can commit to and believe in the philosophy of it, it can work wonders. Changed my life.
– support system: finally, like any person, everyone gives support plays a huge factor on whether or not a person is successful. Seems like he’s got you, which is a great sign.
Thanks for reading my novel and hope this was helpful. I skimmed on a lot of the important things, though there is much more I could write on. Please, please, please do not hesitate to ask for question or clarification, anyone! I do this for a living and would love to have something to hyperfocus on while I’m bored at home on summer, and am happy to help 🙂
Edit: this info is a combination of years of personal research, my own experiences with ADHD, experiences working with a decent sample size of ADHD students, some conferences I’ve been to for school on ADHD, and weekly meetings with learning specialists who have SPED degrees (mine is English Ed). As I say to my students, I am sometimes wrong. Feel free to correct me (gently, don’t wanna set off that RSD, haha) if something looks incorrect. I will look into it.
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