Eli5 They say our brains always work in a way to protect us and keep us away from danger/harmful situations ..

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And as far as i know our behavioral and emotional responses are controlled By our brain , if so then why do we get hurt and suffer emotionally after breakups even when we know its the best choice for us ?

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The healing is after, and it’s this way:

Later on, down the road, years after a terrible breakup, you might find yourself thinking about that terrible relationship. *The vast majority of the time*, you won’t be thinking about the awful shit. You’ll be thinking about that time you went out for dinner, or to the carnival or whatever *instead* of that time she whipped a solid glass Crock-Pot lid at your head.

*That’s* what your brain does. It minimizes the awful shit you’ve been through so, when you do think about it, it doesn’t feel like you’re living through it *again and again and again*