I was emotionally / psychologically abused for a brief amount of time by a parent when I was a child. I was never diagnosed with PTSD and the abuse has never really bothered me mentally. Over a decade later, I jump every time someone touches me and occasionally when people say my name, no matter who it is. Sometimes I will be fully aware that someone is about to touch me (friend giving me a hug, significant other holding my hand, etc.) and I will still jump as if they caught me off guard. I have also heard some similar stories from other people, none of whom were physically abused. Is there a reason for why this happens?
In: Biology
The brain is hardwired to remember times when you were in danger so that you don’t die if you encounter those same circumstances. And it’s judging danger based on if you felt afraid or hurt, not necessarily physical injury.
Like, say you were attacked by a tiger, but managed to avoid getting hurt by dodging it and then running away. Naturally, that would still be a frightening and upsetting experience, and you’d want to do the same thing in the future (since that reaction kept you alive), so anything that could potentially be a tiger, like hearing a crunch behind you, is now going to put you on guard so that you can react more quickly to dodge the tiger if it jumps at you.
But that means that someone you know stepping on a branch behind you, or a non-dangerous animal like your pet dog walking behind you, or a branch falling down and hitting the ground, are all going to make your brain go, “TIGER! THERE’S A TIGER BEHIND YOU! DO SOMETHING!!!”
Like, you know the phrase, “The man who sleeps with a machete is a fool every night but one”? This is, “The brain that freaks out at noises behind you is overreacting every time EXCEPT the one time it is actually a tiger.”
Substitute “tiger” for “anything that can make you afraid or upset” and you can see why you might have a startle response to innocuous things, even if you were never physically hurt.
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