It has to do with the capsaicin in the peppers (the spicy part). The fat in milk or any dairy product has the ability to encapsulate the capsaicin and allow it pass from the mouth making it feel cooler quicker. If water is used it actually just spreads the heat around. Capsaicin is fat soluble not water soluble.
Hope this helps. I’m a food scientist.
Edit: capsaicin not capsicum. Thanks
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