As a person who deals with depression and anxiety, I understand your frustration. But you speak as if depression is an “existing” living thing, which it is not.
Look. Feelings don’t have as much power as actions. Happiness is a great feeling but we’re most happy when we act out our happiness: we smile, are positive and look at things in a positive way. The feeling is never as strong as the actions that stem from it.
Depression is the same.
Depression is NOT a good feeling. But choosing to stay in bed all day, not eat, feel sorry for yourself, or self medicate away the pain is worse. So bad in fact that it’ll kill you.
Stop giving your feelings more credit than they deserve, especially when they’re negative ones. Feeding those feelings will never help you.
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